A quick prayer request...

...

Well...we could use some prayer down here.  Tonight here at the house, we had one of the craziest spiritual attack/battles I've ever experienced...in my life...and now I leave in four and a half hours...for three days.  I know it'll be fine, but I'm still a little...not really nervous exactly...I just wish I was going to be around.  Our pastor is going to make sure he hangs out here while I'm gone, but it would be great to know that people back home are praying specifically for this.  If you could pray for protection for the guys and for the house...that'd be great.  As well, as sense of spiritual unity and support for each of them towards each other.  Oh...and I'm going to be a bit tired tomorrow, I think...so some extra strength and patience for me would be a good thing too...  =)

Anyhow...I know this is all a bit cryptic...sorry about that.  I just can't really get into it all.  God knows what's going on, so....  =)  Thanks everyone!

The simplest things...

...

Who knew God would use something as simple as a Coke bottle to open a door and bring a deeper understanding of a heart and the issues there that needed to be dealt with. I mean...I guess I did know that...but somehow it still comes as a surprise to me some days...how God uses the simplest things.

One of the guys came into my room last week. He sat on the bed and we started making normal small talk. We chatted for a couple of minutes and then he got kind of quiet. I just sat there, since I wasn’t quite sure what was going on. Then he started to tear up, and I really wasn’t sure what was going on.

Then he started to apologize for different things...none of which seemed that severe to me...but for all of which, I assured him that he had my forgiveness. Then eventually, as I thought he might, he got around to what was really on his heart. In the midst of the tears, he asked for forgiveness for his pride and how he’s treated me at times. That caught me off-guard. Not that he didn’t need to ask for forgiveness (‘cause for sure he did), but that he was all of a sudden recognizing that.

I’ve known this young guy for a lot of years, and we’re great friends. But if there’s one guy in the house that I want to lock in a closet some days (if we had closets here)...it would be him. He can be the greatest help or the biggest pain (as I write that, I sort of wince because I can kind of imagine my mom reading and laughing...I’m pretty sure she’s said that about me on more than one occasion). With this guy though, it all comes down to his pride. I’m not going to go into great detail, but his pride is the root of a lot of the conflict he ends up having with other people (and for sure with me).

The past couple of weeks with him haven’t been that great either. He’s been working long hours at a construction site over the holidays, and has come home beyond tired. I’ve tried to give him grace for that very reason, and not sweat the small stuff. But yea...he’s been difficult. On good days that pride and attitude can come out in him. On bad days when he’s super tired? Oye...as we say here in Bolivia.

Bit by bit, he shared with me the story of what had happened that day. He’d called me in the morning and asked if I could bring him some dry work clothes he had in his room. He was mixing cement (which is done manually here) and the cement and water had soaked through the clothes he was wearing, making them really uncomfortable (and giving him blisters). I told him no problem, and headed off to his work site. He saw me when I arrived and came over while the cement he’d just mixed was hauled up to the fifth floor where they were working.

I handed over the bag, along with some buns I’d brought for him. I knew he wasn’t going to make it home that day for lunch, so I thought that might help him get to the end of the day. He said thanks and then asked if I would mind grabbing him a Coke. So I walked over to a store a couple of blocks away and bought him a Coke too. He was working again when I got back, so I just dumped the bottle on top of his clothes and took off. I really didn’t think much about any of it.

When they stopped for lunch, one of the other workers asked who the gringo who left the Coke was. So my guy explained where he lived, who I was and how I was helping him. The other worker stopped, looked my fellow right in the eye and told him that he’d been disrespectful to me when I was there...that he hadn’t been very thankful. Then he got pretty emotional and said, with tears in his eyes, that he wished he had someone like that to help him change his life.

I gather he said other things too, but it all hit my guy really hard...he was pretty emotional while he was trying to talk to me. I got a little lost. But in general, I understood that he suddenly realized how much he was taking for granted and what he was actually receiving...how many people would kill to be in his place. And he recognized how prideful he’d been in the past. Over and over he just kept asking for my forgiveness.

Since then, I can see a definite change in his attitude. It’s been like night and day. I’d been experiencing a bit of a tough time just before this, and doing the “is this ministry really succeeding” questioning thing. So this caused me to take a step back and realize that God is at work in ways that I can’t see or even imagine. I need to trust that and not second guess everything. Once again...this is not my ministry, it’s God’s. He’s brought us this far...

Thank you for your prayers. That’s a huge part of what happens here.

Nothing important...

...

This really has nothing to do with anything, but it made me laugh.  So I figured I'd share it.  I was walking through the toy section of our local grocery store (it's our version of Superstor) today, and I noticed a big display of boxes of castles/knights/catapults...that sort of thing.  At first glance I thought it was an "Age of Empires" toy display (all the lettering was the same), but then realized it was a knock-off.  I was clued in by the "Empire Ages" title on the box.  Knock-off's aren't really that unusual here, or normally worth commenting on (although the "Eagle American" t-shirt I saw the other day made me smile...see guys, word order is actually important).  Anyhow, what was funnier about this was the caption below the title (in English)...

"A Kind of Exciting Game!"

Wow, guys...seriously, way to aim high and build expectations!  "It's not the greatest game out there, but...you know...it's kind of exciting..."

Anyhow...that's all.  You can go back to your lives now...

Road trip to Camirri...

...

So...I haven't had much time lately to sit down and write something wise here.  Or, barring that, at least something entertaining.  Well...truth be told, it's not so much the not having enough time thing, as it is the fact that it's super hot here right now and I'm feeling overheated and lazy.  But let's be nice to Ken and all pretend it's the first one...

So I thought I'd at least post a few pictures to keep the ol' blog alive.  Back before Christmas, I drove Andres, his brother Jose Manuel, their two sisters and a social worker (from the home where the two girl's live) to Camirri, the city where they used to live.  We spent a couple of days there, visiting their grandmother and their youngest sister who lives with her. 

It was a good trip, although I'll admit I was a bit concerned at first.  Being back in Camirri always brings back a lot of emotion for the kids, especially Andres and Jose Manuel.  They went to the streets when Andres was seven or eight and Jose Manuel was probably six.  Their dad was drinking and becoming abusive, and it was just easier to escape to the streets.  The sad thing was, when they went home to visit after a couple of years, they found out that their dad was gone, and their mom had died unexpectedly.  That's still a difficult thing for them.  Andres shared his testimony while Micah was here, and although I can see that God has brought a lot of healing...there's still some pain there.

At any rate, the trip went well, and the kids had a good time.  They hadn't seen their youngest sister in a number of years, so it was fun to watch them all get reacquainted.  Here're some pictures...

Thanks to all of you who were praying for us.  There's no doubt that the guys were at lot more at peace that the last time we visited a couple of years ago.  It was interesting to walk through the main plaza (park) and have Jose Manuel point out all the places he used to sleep, his "beds" as he explained with a laugh.  Up on the roof of the gazebo in the centre of the plaza...underneath a stone and metal statue when it was raining....  It was a bit surreal to imagine that, as I walked with the boys and see who they are now.

The trip is actually a nice drive (I actually sent the cruise on about 110 km/h and mostly left it there!), so I'm hoping we can do it again soon.  I know their little sister would sure like that.  She went from being an only child to being in a family of five!  And she enjoyed it!  =)

I promise I'll be back here soon...  Thanks for your patience and continued prayers!

Just something to read...

...

“In the darkness something was happening at last. A voice had begun to sing. It was very far away and Digory found it hard to decide from what direction is was coming. Sometimes it seemed to come from all directions at once. Sometimes he almost thought it was coming out of the earth beneath them. Its lower notes were deep enough to be the voice of the earth herself. There were no words. There was hardly even a tune. But it was, beyond comparison, the most beautiful noise he had ever heard. It was so beautiful he could hardly bear it.”

~ C.S. Lewis

 
I really like this.  It's from "The Magician’s Nephew". 

It was good for me to think on it today.  So I thought I'd share it.

Forgiveness...

...

So yea...I had to physically break up a fight here at the house the other night. That was a new one. Our first, all out fist-throwing fight in two years. I guess that’s not a bad record. =) I was just talking to one of the guys in my room, and then when we finished, he went into his room. Two minutes later I heard some scuffling and the throwing around of furniture. I wasn’t actually all that concerned since I live in a house with a bunch of guys and they tend to wrestle and the sound of furniture being thrown around isn’t all that unusual. But I got up to go watch the fun anyhow. Being me, I still didn’t realize it was an actual, all-out fight until one of the guys seriously clocked the other guy in the side of the head.

Then I finally stepped in and broke it up. Better late than never I guess. I sat them down and tried to get the story out of them, but they were both pretty emotional and were talking really, REALLY fast. I was only catching about every sixth word. I kept trying to get them to talk to me (rather than each other), but since I couldn’t really respond with anything approaching intelligence (since I didn’t know what the heck they were talking about), they kept going back to arguing with each other.

I finally suggested that they calm down and we would talk about it in the morning. They agreed, and I headed back to my room. I seriously didn’t get ten feet and I heard them going at it again. The second time, I actually had to physically get in between them and rip them apart. I’ve never done that before. I mean, I’ve seen it on TV and truth be told...one small part of my brain was actually a bit entertained. It was sort of like being in my own little episode of Degrassi or something.

Yes, yes, I know...worst missionary ever. No need to write me. And anyhow, seriously...it was just a small part...  =)

This time I put them in different rooms and talked to them separately. The funny thing is, neither of them are really fighters. The one kid was shaking so bad afterwards, that he started to cry. It was just one of those dumb moments when someone pushes you too far and you snap. And trust me, the guys here know how to push too far. I’ve snapped on occasion myself. No actual throwing of punches was involved, but I ranted petty hard-core in my head for quite some time afterwards.

The reason I mention this (besides the fact that, yea...I am still a little bit entertained), is that we ended up talking a lot this week, about forgiveness. I had another situation with one of the guys (which I won’t bother getting into) that led us to the same topic. That guy was struggling with the attitudes of one of our neighbours.

Forgiveness is a tough one for some of the guys...as it is for a lot of us. You don’t have to dig very deep here, and a lot of anger surfaces about things that have happened in the past. People who have hurt them or abused them or abandoned them. And the truth is, some of the guys here have good reason to be angry.

The problem is, it becomes routine...having an unforgiving heart. Big things...little things...it all becomes the same. Hearts become hard and even the smallest slight becomes something that’s unforgivable.

In the midst of those conversations, we talked a lot about why we forgive. And not just because it’s commanded by God (which it is). God always has good reasons for his commandments...and the command to forgive is no exception.

We’re told to forgive precisely for the reasons I just wrote above. Our hurt...our anger...our hardness of heart...it’s really not about the other person at all. Often...especially for the guys here...the other person never even knows they’ve been forgiven. And I doubt it would matter to them, even if they did know.

The reason we forgive is for us. God desires us to live lives that are free.

Freedom is something that often escapes us. Again, that’s even more true for people coming off the streets. Life on the streets masquerades itself as freedom...no one to tell you what to do...live as you want...do as you want...

The reality is, it’s exactly the opposite of freedom. It’s all about bondage and destruction. Years afterwards, many of the guys here are still trying to come to terms with the consequences of their lives on the streets. To be at peace. To experience freedom.

Forgiveness is a big part of that. I remember taking one of the guys through the “Steps to Freedom”, a tool I use here a lot. I never quite know how people are going to be affected by the experience. This young guy was the first kid from the streets I ever took through the process. He worked his way through everything quite calmly, until we got to the part that deals with forgiveness. It asks you to choose to forgive the people who have hurt and wronged you, and then to forgive yourself (as someone who’s been forgiven by God).

Among others, he chose to forgive his dad, who’d abandoned him and his siblings when he was six years old. The tears started to fall, and by the time he got to the part about forgiving himself, he could hardly speak.

Forgiveness is a powerful thing.

But, of course, it’s difficult. We don’t want to let that other person off the hook. We want revenge. We want them to suffer...even though, most times, the other person has no idea how we even feel.

Here at the house, we’re getting there. There are some guys who have been able to let go of a lot of what’s happened to them, and trust that God will deal with it. Other guys are still working their way through what it all means. It’s such a pride issue as well... learning to let go and trust. To tell someone that you’ve forgiven them (or to ask for their forgiveness).

The two guys who had the fight? After we talked and prayed together (and everyone calmed down), I made them shake hands. My parents used to make my brothers and I do it (actually I think they made us hug) and we hated it. But it’s a good thing to do. Today the guys seem a lot better and I think with a few days, it’ll all be ancient history. Another reason I like working with guys. If this were the girl’s home? We’d still be talking about this in June... (Just kidding ladies...although you know it’s true...).   =)

Thanks for continuing to pray for us here. It makes a difference! If you can pray about all of this when you have a moment, I’d appreciate it!

A quick prayer request...

...

This is going to be quick, 'cause it's late and I'm tired.  =)  I just wanted to ask for some prayer when you have a moment.  I think I've used this analogy in the past, of how some days, ministry here feels like the plate spinning guy who's trying to keep fifteen or twenty plates going all at the same time.  There are ten guys that I work closely with here, and I'm not sure when the last time all ten were doing well and were content all at the same time.  There always seems to be someone who's annoyed at something.  They're great guys and obviously I care a lot about them.  But some days a two by four up the side of the head seems like a viable option.  =) 

I think it would be easier if I wasn't living with them 24/7.  I actually don't mind that most days, but there are moments when you just wish you could get away for a bit.  I posted on my Facebook status that I was kind of tired of what I do for a living.  That was probably suckier than I needed to be...I don't think it's that bad.  But...I would still definitely appreciate your prayers. 

I did end up having a good evening with one of the guys.  We went out to a movie and for supper to celebrate how well he did in school this past year.  He was a machine when it came to studying, and it was good to see how serious he's been taking it.  We needed to have some good hangout time, too.  He's one of the guys who, it seems to me, has been struggling.  I haven't seen much joy or peace in him for awhile.  Then that plays out in how we end up relating to each other.  We had a good conversation about it tonight though...so that's good.  I was praying about it all day, that God would give me the opportunity to talk about it with him.

But there are at least two other situations that need to be dealt with tomorrow, so...  =) 

It doesn't help I guess, that I've been struggling a bit with health stuff.  I feel dumb saying that, 'cause it always feels like there's something.  But I've just been having some pain in my lower abdomen.  I got some tests done and the doctor doesn't think it's anything serious...but she wasn't sure exactly what it was either.  So I'm off to see a specialist on Monday or Tuesday.  It's not a huge deal...it's just uncomfortable most of the time.

One funny side note, and then I'll leave you alone.  I had to get an ultrasound done as one of the tests, and it ended up being one of the weeks more entertaining moments.  First of all...how anyone can figure out what they're actually looking at on the screen is beyond me.  I was pretty sure I saw a baby in there at one point...but it turned out to be my left kidney.  My right kidney was playing a little game of hide and seek with the doctor...so that took up a good chunk of time as he went searching for it. 

Then he asked me if I had my blahblahblah still.  I had no idea what he was talking about.  Most of the names of your internal organs are similar in Spanish and English, so I can figure them out.  This sounded kind of like ventricular which I though sounded like it should have something to do with my heart.  I still have everything associated with my heart...so I told him that, yes I did have my blahblahblah.  So he spent the next twenty minutes looking for it.  He muttered a LOT.  The whole thing surprised me, as I figured anything to do with my heart should be relatively easy to find.  But then again, that screen was pretty crappy, so...  Finally in frustration, he asked me again, if I had my...whatever it was.  Then he slowly said it in English...gaalllblllaaadderrrr.

Oh...actually no, I don't. 

I could hear the nurse on the other side of the screen just about killed herself laughing.  The doctor just shook his head and continued his muttering.  In the end, I'm not really sure what the point of that whole test was.  I tried to show him where my pain was, and he was all, "Yea, there's nothing there but intestines."  Well...yea.  That's kind of the problem.  But it seems that searching for my right kidney and my non-existent gallbladder was much more interesting for him.   So him pretty much ignored the one area that actually hurt.  On the upside, I now know for sure that I have all my organs except for my gallbladder.  That's a relief.

Anyhow, thanks for praying everyone!  I appreciate it.  And please know that it makes a difference down here!  I'll be back soon with those pictures of New Years...